Sense Sonnet - Chiller

Who Done It?

The victim was a rich widow.
She had been beaten at home by
A lady's spiked heel. Death was slow.
The cops searched for clues, low and high.
The list of suspects did assume:
The cook, maid, butler and his wife.
Then, the cops found a hidden room.
The killer lived a double life.
Inside, they found the murder shoe,
Along with loads of ladies' wear.
The widow was killed when she knew
Of the closet case lurking there.

Of the suspect feet, just one fit.
The cross-dressing butler done it.

Sense Sonnet - Acher

Hard to Realize

They think that I'm too old to drive,
That at eighty four, I'm past tense.
Most of them weren't even alive
When I got driving compliments.
I took the driving tests last year,
Passed, and got my license renewed.
My driving record's free and clear.
No way am I coming unglued.
I'm getting old - but that's no sin.
Why are there police all around,
And paramedics rushing in?
And who's that lying on the ground?

I hear them say I hit a kid.
Oh God, I can't believe I did.

Sense Sonnet - Tickler

Jitters

Sam had become a nervous wreck.
He was to give a speech next week
To a convention on high tech.
Hundreds of folks would hear him speak.
Sam couldn't stand it anymore.
He told the doctor what was wrong.
Then Sam collapsed onto the floor.
The doctor told him to be strong.
They wheeled Sam to emergency.
His belly bounced from side to side.
His doctor performed surgery,
And cut Sam's stomach open wide.

Sam told the truth, there was no doubt.
A bunch of butterflies flew out.

Sense Sonnet - Steamer

Curious

For years, I belonged to the church,
But never really felt a part.
So after a lot of soul search,
I felt it was time to depart.
I didn't want them hounding me,
So I gave the pastor a call,
Pretending to be family,
And said I had died from a fall.
Though I said I'd been cremated,
The church was having a service.
My attendance generated
Some weird looks, which made me nervous.

I guess I came because of doubt,
How many people would turn out.

Sense Sonnet - Pumper

The Way We Choose

We the people gave the dream birth,
Choosing to build a nation strong.
Coming from all parts of the earth,
We made choices - some right, some wrong.
But the way of life, liberty,
And the pursuit of happiness,
For each and all citizenry,
Stays the course we choose to progress.
Liberty and justice for all -
Ideals we struggle to attain.
Yet the nation avoids downfall
Where the free and the just remain.

In the nation, U. S. of A.
We the people still choose the way.

Sense Sonnet - Chiller

Late Night Snack

It was late now, after midnight -
Time to dig up something to eat.
Ah, just the thought of that first bite
Into a juicy piece of meat.
The spot I picked had no delay.
I studied the menu with zeal,
At last selecting an entree.
Moments later, I had my meal.
Since I was one who did not cook,
To dine - this was the perfect place.
I leaned over my meal and took
A bite from the cadaver's face.

I believe in the Golden Rule;
For after all, I am a ghoul.

Sense Sonnet - Acher

Wildlife Death

The couple walk in a state park.
Unknown to them, they walk too near
The home cave of a matriarch.
A mother puma knows no fear,
When faced with protecting her young.
She snarls and readies her attack.
But before the puma has strung,
The couple make a quick backtrack,
Reporting their close call with harm.
It's decided, as humans will,
To view Mom's instinct with alarm.
Rangers later hunt her and kill.

The baby wild cats wait and wait,
But Mom is dead and that's their fate.

Sense Sonnet - Tickler

Wishful Drinking

From his lifeboat, a sailor saw
In the ocean a lamp float by.
All alone by luck of the draw,
He snatched the lamp and rubbed it dry.
And "poof" there popped out a genie,
Who told him he had one wish.
(A cutback from the normal three)
Since he loved to drink like a fish,
What to wish for was oh so clear.
So he made that wish on the spot.
The whole ocean turned into beer.
But then he had a second thought.

When his bladder reached over-bloat,
He would have to pee in the boat.

Sense Sonnet - Steamer

Do Not Disturb

The young woman and the young man
Held each in a loving embrace,
Oblivious to all time span,
Through eternity, face to face.
Discovered accidentally,
Subjected to public display,
Disruption of their harmony,
Reality in modern day.
Buried entwined in lovers lains,
A love story still untold.
Tests determining that the remains
Are over five thousand years old.

When all the bone testers are done,
May the couple re-rest as one.

Sense Sonnet - Pumper

Emma

Emma Faust Tillman died Sunday,
At one hundred and fourteen years.
The Wednesday before, records say,
She got world's oldest person cheers.
Her lifetime touched three centuries.
Born to parents who were freed slaves.
One of twenty three hes and shes,
Seeing them all go to their graves.
A Connecticut mom and wife
And small business owner as well.
Simply living a long, long life,
Through oh so many times do tell.

Emma's final four days of fame,
Let us all see how far she came.

Sense Sonnet - Chiller

Shooting the Shooting

She came, and with her lawyer love,
Leaving me to be by myself.
For the record, it ran above,
A video cam on a shelf.
It was a meeting to decide
On how to split the property
We acquired while the knot was tied -
To end the marriage properly.
They pulled punches. I pulled my gun.
The lawyer tried to run for life.
I was guilty of murder one.
Murder two - and I "ex"ed my wife.

Before I too went on to die,
I grinned into the camera's eye.

Sense Sonnet - Acher

Done

Life is so empty anymore.
Same old stuff day in and day out.
Being alive is just a bore.
Nothing to be juiced up about.
I'm tired of home and sick of school.
Nobody really understands.
The whole damn world thinks I'm a fool.
I could care less for life's demands.
So better take the short and sweet.
I put the rope around my throat,
And kick the chair out from my feet.
The last thing I see is my note.

Dear Mom and Dad. I choose to die.
I guess it's time. I don't care why.

Sense Sonnet - Tickler

From Mouths of Babes

Billy Graham drove into town,
To give a sermon at a church.
Though a reverend of renown,
He always was on the soul search.
This was his first time coming here,
So he asked a lad going by,
If Elm Street happened to be near.
He got directions in reply.
He thanked the boy and asked him to
Please attend his sermon tonight,
And hear how to find heaven true.
The boy asked in a tone polite,

"If you don't know where Elm Street is,"
"How can you find heaven, gee whiz?"

Sense Sonnet - Steamer

False Lead

The piper plays a catchy tune,
To lull the listener in song.
It is a soothing sound, and soon,
All the children follow along.
The piper leads them merrily
Down the path, that's soft on the feet
And pleasing for the eye to see.
For the children, this is a treat.
The piper hurries up the pace.
The music makes the children run
Behind the piper, in a race.
The children think it's all in fun,

We are the piper playing doom,
Leading the children to the tomb.

Sense Sonnet - Pumper

Working Mom

Sometimes I find I must or can
Take my son, Mike, with me to work.
My boss okays this day care plan.
I'm grateful for this extra perk.
Being a full time working gal,
Raising a one year old alone,
I hope that this Mom always shall
Be there to share Mike getting grown.
Today, while I'm at my job site,
I can see Mike in his playpen.
It's a warm day, sunny and bright.
Mike watches me and the workmen.

I give my little guy a wave,
Then return to digging the grave.

Sense Sonnet - Chiller

Ghost Crossing

Calvary Cemetery lies
Along Lake Michigan's north shore.
Sheridan Road cuts through lengthwise,
This site of local ghostly lore.
Many upon the Road had seen
A man rise from the lake at night,
And through the traffic he'd careen
To cemetery gates shut tight.
Then back across the Road he'd dart,
Into the lake, into the night.
One night the gates were wide apart.
The man went through and out of sight.

Traffic no more was haunted by
That jaywalking ghost of a guy.

Sense Sonnet - Acher

Test Result

There was this monkey in a cage;
And if he wanted some cocaine,
He'd push a button on a gauge,
For a measured amount - with pain.
Each time he'd press the button in,
He would receive a double hit.
A bag would drop into a bin;
A low volt shock would sting a bit.
One day, the voltage was increased,
And no bags dropped in this new test.
All other activity ceased.
The monkey pressed and pressed and pressed...

I know the hell cocaine can be.
It made a monkey out of me.

Sense Sonnet - Chiller

Or Maybe That

It is Miami in July.
Without the wind, it's ten below.
The snow drifts are seven feet high.
Ice jams the Gulf of Mexico.
In order just to walk outside,
I must wear a protective suit,
To keep my body fortified
From cold gases that do pollute.
I still don't really understand
Why the spewed carbons in the air
Caused the polar caps to expand,
And now it's frigid everywhere.

So we bear winter all year long.
I guess Al Gore Etal. were wrong.

Sense Sonnet - Steamer

Or Maybe This

January in Montreal,
Ninety degrees and humid hot,
Almost constant acid rainfall.
Winter wonderland, this is not.
The Atlantic Ocean will soon
Keep rising till we're in its reach.
That with the now constant monsoon
Will not make for a welcome beach.
Water, water everywhere,
And each drop contaminated.
Masks are needed to breathe the air
Survival is guesstimated.

Global warming sweats in hindsight.
I guess Al Gore Etal. were right.

Sense Sonnet - Tickler

Wind Breaker

Pecos Bill was a little bored,
When a tornado happened by.
What the heck? Pecos jumped aboard.
The funnel whirled into the sky.
To get Pecos off of its back,
The tornado plowed the Great Plains,
Leaving the Rockies in its track.
But Pecos kept hold of the reins,
The tornado knew it was tamed,
And let out such a torrent of piss.
The Grand Canyon formed where it aimed,
And Pecos said enough of this.

Hoppin' off the twister, Bill grinned,
"I'm gul durned good at breakin' wind."

Sense Sonnet - Steamer

Fatal Instinct

I got Polly from a pet store,
When she was only a foot long.
My house was all hers to explore.
I didn't see anything wrong.
It was only the two of us,
And Polly didn't wander far.
Visitors sometimes made a fuss,
But I like things the way they are.
I like her special kind of curl,
She slides into quiet and quick.
Polly's grown to be a big girl,
Twelve feet long and six inches thick.

I wake up gasping for some breath.
Polly is squeezing me to death.

Sense Sonnet - Pumper

Fan Fare

You and I and Dad got to go
To the Super Bowl, all first class.
You were why, I want you to know,
That this adventure came to pass.
In return for tickets mid field,
I showed off a big belly ad.
Nothing improper was revealed
By you or your Mom or your Dad.
Even though the Bears dropped the ball,
Even through some on and off rain,
A super time was had by all
Three, on first down memory lane.

So feel free to toot your own horn
Before, during and after born.

Sense Sonnet - Chiller

Bad Spot

My horse is spooked and throws me down,
Then gallops off into the night,
It's way too far to walk to town.
I need some shelter till day light.
I gather brush and make a fire
In a gully out of the wind;
And snuggle close by to retire
Away the time I have to spend.
I hear the hissing, rattling sound.
At first I think it's just a dream.
But, I see shadows move around
And dancing eyes about me gleam.

I remember that heat awakes
A hybernating nest of snakes.

Sense Sonnet - Acher

Wake of Prejudice

I wake up to a painful day,
Feeling scared that I'm all alone;
And somehow have to make my way
Through the hatred that's all I've known.
If only I could change, I would.
But, I must stay the way I am.
My pretending could do no good.
The truth would not be worth a damn.
The one escape is when I sleep.
It's then that I can dream away
The hurt. But, then I have to keep
Waking up to a painful day.

It is for me a fearful fate,
To wake up in my world of hate.

Sense Sonnet - Pumper

Game Prayer

Later today, the Colts and Bears
Will meet to play a football game.
God gets to hear a lot of prayers
On who should have the winning claim.
But hopefully God's main concern
Will be to thwart any attack
From those who'd like to take a turn
As a mass murder maniac.
May God bless all those on the field,
That they may play injury free;
And that the game's outcome will yield
The best that sportsmanship can be.

Winner and loser later told,
But all be safely Super Bowled.

Sense Sonnet - Tickler

Eating Sensibly

A hungry lion ambled through
The jungle for something to munch.
Two guys, off guard, came into view.
"Ah," thought the lion, "Here is lunch."
One was writing at his lapboard.
The other was reading a book.
The writer - the lion ignored.
The poor reader - the lion took,
And gobbled down the guy entire;
Then merely watched the other run.
If so hungry, one might inquire,
Why did the lion eat just one?

The king of the jungle assessed:
Writers cramp, while readers digest.

Sense Sonnet - Steamer

Driven

"You two are being very good"
"For Mommy, while she has to drive;"
"Just like I knew you angels would."
"In just a moment we'll arrive."
"Okay, that was the last bump."
"Now all we have to do is wait."
"That's just the engine going thump."
"It must be getting very late."
"Oh Heather, don't you start to cry."
"Robbie, please hold your sister tight."
"You both should close your eyes and try"
"To sleep - no matter what. Good night."

She drove herself into the lake;
But why with children, for God's sake?

Sense Sonnet - Pumper

Pairable

Mahatma Gandhi and a friend
Were standing on a train platform.
The train came from around the bend.
Whistling its stop as was the norm.
As Gandhi stepped to board the train,
One of his shoes fell to the ground.
He could not reach it, that was plain.
As the wheels started forward bound,
His other shoe he quickly took,
And tossed it near where the first fell.
His friend gave him a puzzled look.
And Gandhi smiled, with this to tell,

"It's good for one to find a shoe,"
"But even better to find two."