Sense Sonnet - Chiller

Inflicted

It's over 20 years ago,
I committed an awful crime,
Raping a child. And, I do know
That I deserved the prison time.
And while behind bars I know that
Even though others hurt me bad,
I couldn't act, where I was at,
On urges to hurt kids I had.
But now back in society,
I have no feeling that I'm free.
Everywhere, children I see,
The old sickness is still in me.

Urges are consuming my life.
I'm cutting them off with a knife.